For the longest time, I didn’t understand that some relationships are just bad news. That up and down, hot and cold, Jekyll and Hyde feeling wasn’t supposed to be there and was totally messing with my mental health. Fortunately, I got into therapy and started to learn some of the indicators of a relationship that is life draining. These are 4 of the top signs that I saw in my own relationship, and so I have first hand experience with them.
What if I think this describes my relationship?
Ok, take a deep breath. I’m not advocating that you end the relationship immediately or anything like that. But I would suggest talking to a qualified therapist who can help you decide what to do next. You might not even have a good handle on the damage this relationship is doing to your own wellness. Having an outside opinion will make a huge difference.
It’s also a good idea to talk to a third party before you make any big changes because they can help evaluate your safety. If you are dealing with a gaslighter, liar, narcissist, or other type of toxic person, you want to have a plan before you try to confront them in case they get out of control. Don’t be scared, just be smart!
Here are 4 signs you are in a toxic relationship:
I am not a licensed therapist or mental health professional. If you are suffering and need treatment please seek the help of a professional. This post may contain affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase.

Now that you’ve read through, what’s the verdict?
Do you see a pattern of these in your relationship? It can be overwhelming, but also validating to realize your relationship has some toxic aspects. Don’t feel bad if you have conflicted feelings right now. Take a few days to process, then talk to a therapist and make a game plan. Just don’t stay stuck, you deserve better than toxicity! Whatever you decide to do, you’ve got this!



This reads exactly like my ex boyfriend. I knew him for 3 years and he convinced me to relocate for him. The day I showed up and we actually talked in person it was like meeting a whole other man. He was insecure, unstable, abusive, and all around a horrid person to live with. I tried to make things work despite that but things came to a head and I spent Christmas alone while he flew off to Vegas. I’m glad that is over with and more articles like this need to exist so women don’t waste their time on the wrong men.
Oh Melissa, what an awful person you got mixed up with. I’m so glad you are free of him! Sending much love!
I just left an abusive relationship and these are spot on
Talissa, having left one myself I know how much courage that takes. You are so strong!
Great and informative post – the infographic is spot on. I’ve been in a number of toxic relationships (sometimes I was the toxic one, sometimes it was both) and it’s been really helpful to have resources like this so I could learn to move forward from that. Thanks for sharing <3
Maria I can tell you have been doing internal work to be able to see where you contributed to the toxicness in a relationship. It took me a good year of therapy before I could see that for myself. I’m so glad it was helpful, thanks for stopping by!